Her: “Would it be OK if my mom came for a visit?”
Me: “Of course. When?”
Her: “I’m going to look for flights now.”
Her: “I got her a flight for March 26th.”
Me: “Oh good, she’ll be here for Easter.”
Her: “Yeah, and The Boy’s spring break.”
Me: “How long is she staying?”
Her: “She said to just get her a one-way ticket…”
Me: “I’m gonna need a bigger bourbon.”
Erm, actually, "fiancé" is only for the groom-to-be. "Fiancée" is the B2B. So.
I have no idea what you’re talking about and besides I already fixed it.
I can’t be Tumblr Pope, I have like 8 wives.
I will admit to being briefly excited about the prospect of getting to wear a big jaunty hat.
When cosmetic surgeon Allan Wu first heard the woman’s complaint, he wondered if she was imagining things or making it up.
A resident of Los Angeles in her late sixties, she explained that she could not open her right eye without considerable pain and that every time she forced it open, she heard a strange click—a sharp sound, like a tiny castanet snapping shut.
After examining her in person at The Morrow Institute in Rancho Mirage, Calif., Wu could see that something was wrong: Her eyelid drooped stubbornly, and the area around her eye was somewhat swollen.
Six and a half hours of surgery later, he and his colleagues had dug out small chunks of bone from the woman’s eyelid and tissue surrounding her eye, which was scratched but largely intact.
The clicks she heard were the bone fragments grinding against one another.
Executive Summary via @tomroyal on Twitter:
"Woman uses unapproved stem-cell based cosmetic treatment…
Grows extra bones.
In her eyelids.”
Sleep well, everyone!
Also: “The Morrow Institute”? This takes Dammit Morrow to a whole new level.