Fun Size Bytes


  1. This may be the best “couldn’t make this up if you tried” coincidence of my life.

    Almost worth the mental scar of seeing a hairy ass pressed up against glass.

  2. A) If they aren’t calling it the “Kegel Kounter” they have missed a huge opportunity.

B) I, too, think it’s a really interesting space. Definitely worth some in-depth investigation. Again… and again… and…

C) Someone else suggested calling it the “FitSlit” which is either hilarious or deeply offensive and I agree with whichever interpretation you choose.

    A) If they aren’t calling it the “Kegel Kounter” they have missed a huge opportunity.

    B) I, too, think it’s a really interesting space. Definitely worth some in-depth investigation. Again… and again… and…

    C) Someone else suggested calling it the “FitSlit” which is either hilarious or deeply offensive and I agree with whichever interpretation you choose.

  3. ♥

(Thanks thisdayinfavrd.)

    (Thanks thisdayinfavrd.)

  4. If you can help me explain this to the folks at the church I will be your best friend forever.

OTOH I am reminded of the wise words (as usual) from my former Senior Pastor who taught me:


  The interruptions are the job. Everything else is paperwork.


sigh

I hate it when he’s right.

    If you can help me explain this to the folks at the church I will be your best friend forever.

    OTOH I am reminded of the wise words (as usual) from my former Senior Pastor who taught me:

    The interruptions are the job. Everything else is paperwork.

    sigh

    I hate it when he’s right.

  5. @elongreen:


  This, from 1922, is the greatest headline in the history of @nytimes, or any other paper. http://pic.twitter.com/7rUTiXSBXd

    @elongreen:

    This, from 1922, is the greatest headline in the history of @nytimes, or any other paper. http://pic.twitter.com/7rUTiXSBXd

  6. When Companies Try to Share One Twitter Account to do Customer Support

    User: “ARGH! Trying to do {thing} with Company X is soooo frustrating!”

    CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! What’s the problem that you’re having? ^CS”

    User: “@CompanyXSupport I tried to do {thing} and I used the instructions at http://your/web/site but it didn’t work and I don’t know what to try now!”

    CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! Are you on Windows or an iPhone? ^SE”

    User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m on a Mac!”

    CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! What are you trying to do? ^YA”

    User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m trying to do {thing}! I followed the instructions but it didn’t work!”

    CompanyXSupport: “@User Sorry you’re having trouble, We’re here to help! The instructions for doing {thing} are at http://place/you/ve/already/looked”

    User: “@CompanyXSupport Yes! That’s what I tried to do that didn’t work. What else can I do?”

    CompanyXSupport: “@User We’re here to help! What’s the problem that you’re having? ^AP”

    User: “@CompanyXSupport I’m trying to do {thing}! I followed the instructions but it didn’t work!”

    I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve gone through this. The same pattern every time:

    1. Mention Company X (by name not @) on Twitter.
    2. Company X pays someone to monitor Twitter search for mentions of their company.
    3. Every @reply from Company X is “signed” by a different person (that’s the ^Initials at the end of the post).
    4. None of them seem to have any clue what previous people have suggested, and never seem to bother to check previous messages.
    5. They all pull phrases from the Big Book Of Customer Support Handbook.
    6. None of them actually bother to follow through and see if their suggestions were helpful.

    I assume they are getting paid per reply, because the only thing you can be guaranteed to get is the “signature” at the end which must be used for tracking responses and getting paid.

    The whole thing ends up being a complete waste of @User’s time, while @CompanyXSupport thinks they are doing a great job because their Social Media Team sends 4,000 messages per day.

    For example, today Verizon’s Tech Support Team “tried” to help:

    1. Me: "Verizon doesn’t support IMAP? How is that even possible?"

    2. VZWSupport: "We do IMAP! What model device? What type of email account?"

    3. Me: "Setting up a friend’s iPad and everything said to use pop.verizon.net"

    4. Someone else from VZWSupport: "That link didn’t load. How can we assist you?" [HINT: READ THE BLOODY THREAD THUS FAR AND ACTUALLY RESPOND TO THE INFORMATION I HAVE ALREADY GIVEN YOU. Also, what app are they using which obviously didn’t translate the t.co version of pop.verizon.net to pop.verizon.net? Apparently they clicked on that link and it failed to load. WELL DUH.]

    5. Me: "Trying to setup IMAP on an iPad for someone with a Verizon dot net email address"

    6. Someone else from VZWSupport: "Staying connected via email is important! Here are the steps to add one: vz.to/1ilybwV ^MM" [That link will take you to generic information for how to add an email account to an iPad but has NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with any Verizon-specific information]

    Result? over the course of 2 hours, they sent me 3 @replies which have been, thus far, complete and utterly useless in actually trying to accomplish what I was trying to do.

    Update: 2013-12-28 See followup post

  7. In a way, this is a relief. It’s been awhile since I made a giant social faux paus in real life, so I was due. Nice to get it out of the way.
  8. I should just leave Twitter now because I’m never going to top this.

    I should just leave Twitter now because I’m never going to top this.

  9. Sometimes one is all you need.

(oops that was supposed to be queued. Oh well.)

    Sometimes one is all you need.

    (oops that was supposed to be queued. Oh well.)

  10. So this one comment has not only spawned the above conversation, but also a second where Nicky and Tiffany are all talking about how much we love “The Monster at the End of This Book” (Supernatural s4e18).

(Lindsay also said something about Michael which I’m choosing to ignore that movie, although now I’m wondering if it was just because it came out around the same time as Phenomenon which I also remember hating.)

Anyway, I’ve really been enjoying Supernatural but season 4 has really turned up the awesome.

(Oh, and I’d be remiss if I didn’t remind y’all that AKMA was a) my Greek professor in seminary and b) part of Tom and Tiffany’s World of Warcraft guild. It’s a small ‘net/world.)

    So this one comment has not only spawned the above conversation, but also a second where Nicky and Tiffany are all talking about how much we love “The Monster at the End of This Book” (Supernatural s4e18).

    (Lindsay also said something about Michael which I’m choosing to ignore that movie, although now I’m wondering if it was just because it came out around the same time as Phenomenon which I also remember hating.)

    Anyway, I’ve really been enjoying Supernatural but season 4 has really turned up the awesome.

    (Oh, and I’d be remiss if I didn’t remind y’all that AKMA was a) my Greek professor in seminary and b) part of Tom and Tiffany’s World of Warcraft guild. It’s a small ‘net/world.)

  11. That’s almost too true to be funny.
  12. I honestly don’t know if “this guy” is me or Neil. I guess probably me if it’s the former or Neil if it’s the latter.

https://twitter.com/KimHellgren/status/298870415143624704

    I honestly don’t know if “this guy” is me or Neil. I guess probably me if it’s the former or Neil if it’s the latter.

    https://twitter.com/KimHellgren/status/298870415143624704

  13. Diana Butler Bass is a well-known and well-respected author in the realm of contemporary Christianity.*

Which is why I love the fact that she is so straight-forward about this.

(When someone tried to chastise her for ‘name-calling’ she replied: “I’m sorry if offended, but I’ve never heard so much hideous theology from so-called pastors on TV & in media.” Amen, sister.)

* her latest book 
Christianity After Religion: The End of Church and the Birth of a New Spiritual Awakening
just moved to the top of my “To Read” pile…

    Diana Butler Bass is a well-known and well-respected author in the realm of contemporary Christianity.*

    Which is why I love the fact that she is so straight-forward about this.

    (When someone tried to chastise her for ‘name-calling’ she replied: “I’m sorry if offended, but I’ve never heard so much hideous theology from so-called pastors on TV & in media.” Amen, sister.)

    * her latest book Christianity After Religion: The End of Church and the Birth of a New Spiritual Awakening just moved to the top of my “To Read” pile…

  14. For those still on Twitter, my one and only Twitter username is now @TJLuoma

    For those still on Twitter, my one and only Twitter username is now @TJLuoma

  15. 
  "Here is an ad from the free Words With Friends app. #throwstuffinherbutt 
  pic.twitter.com/nchsqPvT" — @probablymolly


Suggested Headline

"Zynga: we put the Ass in classy…”

Alternate Caption:

"Whatchoo gonna do with all the junk, all that junk?"

    "Here is an ad from the free Words With Friends app. #throwstuffinherbutt pic.twitter.com/nchsqPvT" — @probablymolly

    Suggested Headline

    "Zynga: we put the Ass in classy…

    Alternate Caption:

    "Whatchoo gonna do with all the junk, all that junk?"